When Is It Okay To Walk?

Monday, October 11, 2010

I was homebound. On the downward slope, wind to my back as though it was ushering me along, I steadied my pace and concentrated on my breathing. I find it funny when people say, " running is my time to think." I mean, for me, ALL I can think about IS running. There is no room in my head for miscellanious thoughts...I'm much too busy scoping out my next rest spot. I alternate between " Inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth" and " Okay, I just have to make it to that ' School Zone' sign and then I can walk." I suppose the more you run, the less you think about running, but I've been running for years now and I havn't gotten to that point. Forget relaxing, running with my coach is anything but relaxing. Yes, I said running with my coach. She is the most useless, good-for-nothing, phony out there. The coach in my head never fails to let me down.

Once I reached the bottom of the hill, approaching my designated " walking point", I could again think outside the rehelm of pain. I silently cursed my coach. I mean, coaches were supposed to be encouraging, and full of motivating phrases to keep pushing you through. Mine, on the other hand, would have rather sat on her lazy butt all Sunday afternoon, reading a book, eating ice cream. Once my lungs again felt functional, and I wondered why I had ever began walking when I was feeling so good now. I started to ask myself something that I think every wanna-be-runner asks: When did it become okay to walk?

In high school, it was never optional. You ran or got benched. You ran whether you felt like your throat was as dry as sand paper or your stomach was in your chest. You ran an 8 minute mile, because walking wasn't optional in order to keep up with the best athletes. So again, I wondered, when did I start telling myself it was okay? So often my mind gives out WELL before my body. My lazy coach tells my body that it's tired and it's going to "DIE" when by body is confussed because it feels fine. The mind is powerful thing, and it almost ALWAYS wins this battle. SO, I find myself walking briskly, disgruntled about the fact that I slowed for NO reason!

It is in this time of question, that I was struck with a bit of fear. How often, I questioned, does my mind tell my body it's too tired in other areas of my life? How much more could I accomplish, how much better of an employee and mother would I be, how great are the things I could achieve, if only I wouldn't let my mind give up before the rest of me was litteraly unable to go further? To this sobering thought I found do answer that left me content because I realized that the answer was reason enough to start pushing myself past those self imposed boundries.

I havn't yet prepared myself for the emotional, phsyical, and mental challanges that lie ahead if I choose to make a change in my approach to success, but the one thing I know is that in order to get there, I have GOT to fire my coach!

3 comments:

  1. Dont let your inner mini me stop you from doing what you want!

    Curious, how did you stumble upon SSL?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was just clickin through blogs and yours popped up. I read some of your posts and decided I wanted to read the ones to come too! lol

    ReplyDelete

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