Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Lola (Our new kitty) is adjusting well. She is still extremely needy, sometimes annoying, and still figuring out that her litter box is in the bathroom, but overall she has been doing well. Last night, I was slightly anxious about her behavior, and extremely exhausted. Add those two together and you get *dun duh da** Psycho Girl! I woke up slightly irritable and ready to throw in the towel already.

I got ready to the music of Meowing, and then woke Caroline up. I got her out of bed, got my morning hugs and kisses, then I froze. I was struck with an extremely enlightening realization. As I looked at Caroline, all innocent and sleepy eyed, I realized what an iconic symbol she is in my life. Now mind you, I realize that most parents have an unconditional love for their children and can not possibly fathom life without them, but in my case, I don't simply love Caroline, I NEED her. What I realized at that moment was: Caroline is the only thing in my life that I haven't given up on. When times are hard, I run from most everything in life: Sports, Relationships, Needy Pets, Jobs, etc. Caroline is the first thing in my life that I love unconditionally and don't look for an "out" of when things don't go as planned.

She has taught me the meaning of the word Committed. I know that she needs me, but she will never understand how much I needed her.

This is a song I listened to A LOT when I was at OU, just trying to get through the semester to go home and have Caroline. I listened to it again the other day, and really can't express my feelings towards her any better than this song can.

...and that my Dear, was all she wrote...

1 comment:

  1. I had to wipe tears from my eyes after reading this post. Caroline is a beautiful little girl and lucky to have a loving mommy like you.



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